LaDieS, dont be fooled by looks, lips and paycheques;
not all that glitters is gold.
Let me share with you some godly proven principles
that would guide you in finding the guy that fits.
I call them "Red and Green Lights On the Road to Alter"
not all that glitters is gold.
Let me share with you some godly proven principles
that would guide you in finding the guy that fits.
I call them "Red and Green Lights On the Road to Alter"
1. Check your own health and readiness before you check the guy out.
You need to deal with any baggage from the past before entering a new relationship.
Many people transpose old feelings and hurts on new relationships and ruin great potentials by so doing. Wait until you are healed from past painful experiences or beautiful memories of old soul ties.
Nobodies like to be squeezed into the mold of another person, good or bad.
Many people transpose old feelings and hurts on new relationships and ruin great potentials by so doing. Wait until you are healed from past painful experiences or beautiful memories of old soul ties.
Nobodies like to be squeezed into the mold of another person, good or bad.
Checking your own health and readiness also means
ensuring you are in the will of God in your personal life
before seeking the will of God in your marital life.
A marriage does not make people it is the people that make a marriage.
Measure your readiness by how well you have surrendered your will to God.
It is difficult to know what God wants for you when you already know
what you want for yourself.
Ask yourself "if God tells me
to walk away from this relationship today,
how willing am I to obey?"
Presence of pain from the past and
unwillingness to surrender to God is red light.
Selflessness and freedom from the past is green light
ensuring you are in the will of God in your personal life
before seeking the will of God in your marital life.
A marriage does not make people it is the people that make a marriage.
Measure your readiness by how well you have surrendered your will to God.
It is difficult to know what God wants for you when you already know
what you want for yourself.
Ask yourself "if God tells me
to walk away from this relationship today,
how willing am I to obey?"
Presence of pain from the past and
unwillingness to surrender to God is red light.
Selflessness and freedom from the past is green light
2. Ask your guy, why he thinks you are special or different from other girls
I am sure you want to hear better answers than "you take my breath away",
“being with you is like being in heaven” or "I don’t know but i just love you".
If he cannot tell you in concrete terms why you stand out from other girls
he may not know why he will leave you for another girl.
Look for answers that tell you how he thinks you have what it takes
to help him accomplish his life mission
as well as how he plans to add value to you in the process
“being with you is like being in heaven” or "I don’t know but i just love you".
If he cannot tell you in concrete terms why you stand out from other girls
he may not know why he will leave you for another girl.
Look for answers that tell you how he thinks you have what it takes
to help him accomplish his life mission
as well as how he plans to add value to you in the process
3. Ask him where he sees himself in the next five years or foreseeable future
No one knows tomorrow but a man old enough to marry
must have a clear direction for his life or he is not qualified
to take another person with him.
If he cannot show you a clear picture of his future,
he probably has no idea where he is heading. Red light, don't proceed.
A guy who knows where he is coming from and where he is going is the right guy
must have a clear direction for his life or he is not qualified
to take another person with him.
If he cannot show you a clear picture of his future,
he probably has no idea where he is heading. Red light, don't proceed.
A guy who knows where he is coming from and where he is going is the right guy
4. Watch how he treats his mom and siblings
Charity they say begins at home. What a person is at home is what he really is.
If he treats his folks disrespectfully because he wants to be with you or please you, it is only a matter of time before he starts treating you disrespectfully when you become a member of his immediate family
Treats folks respectfully? Green light! Treats folks disrespectfully? Red light!
If he treats his folks disrespectfully because he wants to be with you or please you, it is only a matter of time before he starts treating you disrespectfully when you become a member of his immediate family
Treats folks respectfully? Green light! Treats folks disrespectfully? Red light!
5. Watch how he walks
Some may not think walking habit has anything to say about a relationship but it does. Walking ahead of you and not looking back to see how you are doing is indication he may not care much about your well being. Walking behind you is usually a good sign of protection and care especially when boarding a bus or in a rowdy mall. Walking side by side is expression of friendship and support.
Unless where making a pathway demands it, walking ahead of you is red light.
Walking beside you or behind you is green light for the most past
Unless where making a pathway demands it, walking ahead of you is red light.
Walking beside you or behind you is green light for the most past
6. Look out for signs of unrest within you
When present, feelings of urgency or unrest usually indicate danger. Be very careful and do not proceed Generally, God leads his people by peace – the kind of peace that surpasses all human reasoning.
That means your guy may not be very good looking or have a lot of money
but you will not be afraid of your financial future.
He may be very handsome and rich
but you will not be afraid he will dump you or take advantage of you.
Never proceed when you feel uneasy about him or his ways.
It could be God’s way of saving you from trouble.
Unrest is red light. Peace is green light
That means your guy may not be very good looking or have a lot of money
but you will not be afraid of your financial future.
He may be very handsome and rich
but you will not be afraid he will dump you or take advantage of you.
Never proceed when you feel uneasy about him or his ways.
It could be God’s way of saving you from trouble.
Unrest is red light. Peace is green light
7. Watch his giving habit.
Miserly people are hardly transformed and transformed people are hardly miserly.
You need a transformed guy. He carries within him the giving nature of God by default.
Please understand that being miserly is different from being prudent, which is a good management quality.
Prudent people may be strict but never stingy in the negative sense.
A giving habit is green light. Withholding habit is red light
You need a transformed guy. He carries within him the giving nature of God by default.
Please understand that being miserly is different from being prudent, which is a good management quality.
Prudent people may be strict but never stingy in the negative sense.
A giving habit is green light. Withholding habit is red light
8. Does he ask your opinion before making major decisions?
You will know how well he respects you when it's time to make major decisions.
Guys who think your brain worth less than a dime won’t bother asking you what you think about an issue.
In many cases such guys won’t also think twice before dumping you
along the way the moment they find a smarter person.
Two heads are better than one. If his head is good enough, you are not needed
Couples that plan together stay together
Guys who think your brain worth less than a dime won’t bother asking you what you think about an issue.
In many cases such guys won’t also think twice before dumping you
along the way the moment they find a smarter person.
Two heads are better than one. If his head is good enough, you are not needed
Couples that plan together stay together
9. Ask him what you can do for him, anything!
If he asks for sex, it means a few things: he loves your body not you, he wants fun not a future, he has little self control, he is self centered and has little respect for you or your feelings. That’s red light, don't proceed.
If he asks your help in becoming a better person for the dream family
or some long term goals that includes you, that’s green light.
If he asks your help in becoming a better person for the dream family
or some long term goals that includes you, that’s green light.
10. Ask him to share his biggest mistake with
woman, power, money, and God and the lessons he learned.
woman, power, money, and God and the lessons he learned.
Agreed, this is not a question you want to ask on a first date
but do not proceed to the alter without it.
The right guy is the guy who has learned and
applied lessons in these four major areas.
If he is protective, he has not learned.
People are generally free to share a past they have conquered.
You would want to know what he learned from his ex
and what he would do better now.
Look for examples where he applied lessons learned.
Don't marry a toddler-guy without any life lessons.
he will treat you like a toy and throw you in the trash when he is done.
Toddler-guys ruin relationships.
but do not proceed to the alter without it.
The right guy is the guy who has learned and
applied lessons in these four major areas.
If he is protective, he has not learned.
People are generally free to share a past they have conquered.
You would want to know what he learned from his ex
and what he would do better now.
Look for examples where he applied lessons learned.
Don't marry a toddler-guy without any life lessons.
he will treat you like a toy and throw you in the trash when he is done.
Toddler-guys ruin relationships.
11. Analyze your chemistry of attraction.
Are you attracted by love or by lust?
Love sustains but lust fades.
Love gives, lust takes.
Love waits, lust wants it now.
Bad chemistry is body exploration for sensual gratification:
red light, don't proceed.
Good chemistry is compatibility in atmosphere of respect and selflessness:
green light, proceed with caution
Love sustains but lust fades.
Love gives, lust takes.
Love waits, lust wants it now.
Bad chemistry is body exploration for sensual gratification:
red light, don't proceed.
Good chemistry is compatibility in atmosphere of respect and selflessness:
green light, proceed with caution
12. Pray and trust God to lead you in the right path
There is no magic way to find the right guy.
There is a way that seem right to a person but the end leads death.
Human beings judge by appearance but God judge by the heart.
Make the Lord your shepherd, he knows where the right guy is and he will lead you.
Commit your ways to the lord, trust also in him and he will direct your path. Unless the Lord guides you all your efforts may end in vain or at best lead you to the fake guy.
Pray and proceed in faith.
You will succeed!
@Solidrock
We seek and follow divine directions!
There is a way that seem right to a person but the end leads death.
Human beings judge by appearance but God judge by the heart.
Make the Lord your shepherd, he knows where the right guy is and he will lead you.
Commit your ways to the lord, trust also in him and he will direct your path. Unless the Lord guides you all your efforts may end in vain or at best lead you to the fake guy.
Pray and proceed in faith.
You will succeed!
@Solidrock
We seek and follow divine directions!
